And now I’m terrified

21 Jun

We had our second ultrasound today. I’m 7 weeks 5 days.  And there was a little baby in there. With little arm buds and leg buds and he wiggled his butt and the heart rate was 163 and everything was measuring on schedule and it all looked great.  And we got pictures and heard the heartbeat a bunch of times and I totally cried.

And then it hit me. I’m pregnant.  Really pregnant.  Yes, there is still the chance that something could go wrong, but for right now, I’m pregnant. 

I’m going to be someone’s mom.  I’m going to be responsible for an itty bitty human life all the way up to the time where they are not so itty bitty anymore.  And that’s scary.  I never imagined that I would feel so much responsibility.  I feel like I have to change everything in my entire life so that I can deserve to have such a responsibility. 

I’m excited though.  Still nervous.  I’m still worried that something can go wrong.  But I’m starting to get excited.  I’m starting to feel like this is happening and that maybe I can start making plans.  Not huge life changing plans like decorating the nursery today.  But I can start thinking about stuff like that without feeling like I’m a fraud.

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3 Responses to “And now I’m terrified”

  1. FCblacksheep June 21, 2011 at 8:09 pm #

    First, yay on another great ultrasound with a happy, healthy baby. I’m absolutely thrilled for you.

    Second, yes this is really happening and don’t worry you have plenty of weeks ahead to freak out. LOL. And it’ll become a little more real with each passing week. Yippee!!

  2. chon1203 June 22, 2011 at 6:55 pm #

    Hooray, you have leg and arm buds. Totally thrilled babe!!

  3. Low Fat Lady July 3, 2011 at 7:33 am #

    Yea!! So glad for a great ultrasound 😉

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