21 Oct

He was such a survivor.

I got my period and he stuck.

My hCG and progesterone levels were insanely low and he stuck.

I bled and he stuck.

I was in a car accident and he stuck.

I had more bleeding and went to the ER and he stuck.

I thought he was a miracle.  A survivor.  I couldn’t believe a baby could make it through so much.  I thought for sure he would make it.  He had already survived through so much.

It’s so unfair that I developed preeclamplsia and that he was still holding on and we had to end his life to save mine.  He was still sticking and my body was killing him.  He had already stuck through so much.


5 Responses to “Survivor”

  1. Creating A Rainbow October 21, 2011 at 10:25 am #

    Please remember that you, too, are a survivor. You will survive this empty feeling and this loss. It feels like there is no way you can survive a lifetime with this heartache, which is why time lessens the pain. It’s so hard waiting. ICLW. xoxo

  2. chon October 21, 2011 at 5:17 pm #

    just sending you a hug, no words.

  3. New Year Mum October 21, 2011 at 6:27 pm #

    I’m so so sorry for what you’re going through… he certainly was a survivor and you are too. My heart goes out to you and i can only imagine a fraction of what you’re going through… be gentle on yourself xoxo

  4. FCblacksheep October 21, 2011 at 7:36 pm #

    A hug from me too.

  5. kelly October 24, 2011 at 1:30 pm #

    My heart goes out to you. I’m so sorry for your loss.

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